The Day Has Come

After nearly a year of planning, researching, organizing, and hard work… moving day to Madrid has come.

Our family is a mixed bag of emotions right now. Some of us are stressed about the moving logistics. Others are emotional and anxiously excited. Some are counting down the days and hours remaining — and reminding us of the countdown every other minute. If you know us personally, I’m pretty sure you can guess who’s who.

I personally feel numb. Despite all the planning and preparations, the endless conversations with friends and family about our move, and the meticulous organization of our bags (vacation, immediate Madrid, coming with family in October, coming with family in November), it still hasn’t quite hit me.

Having lived overseas before — in college (Prague) and in our pre-children life (Argentina) — I know that moment is coming. The only question is: when?

For now, I’m just going through the motions. We woke up this morning to good ol’-fashioned American pancakes and syrup, kissed with a touch of sprinkles for celebratory effect. The kids are spending the morning with their grandparents while Daniel and I are finalizing laundry and suitcases, running last-minute errands, and double-checking passports. The idea that, in just a few hours, we’ll be wheels up on a new chapter feels both imminent and like a distant dream — and yet here we are. T-minus 10 hours.

Although I’m aware of the big change ahead, I’m also not sure I really see what the big deal is. Our adventure is, at least for now, like a long extended vacation in my mind. I’m aware that this clearly may just be my coping mechanism talking. In fact, I am blissfully aware that is exactly what is happening. But I’m sticking to our simple motto: take it one day at a time.

So many people have asked, “Is this forever?” or “How long are you going to be there?”
The short answer is: we have no idea.

The point is to get uncomfortable.
The point is to try something new.
The point is to see what else is out there — and to see how it feels before making any further decisions.
Isn’t that what life is all about?

The part that excites me most as I sit here is knowing that the unknown will eventually become the known. That all the question marks and blanks will slowly start to fill in with time. That each one means we’ve leaned or experienced something new.

For anyone who knows my typical Type-A, planner side, this next sentence may come as a shock. I ENJOY the adventurous sense of not knowing what’s to come — and not having expectations for how things will go. Because having lived overseas before, I’ve found that living in the unknown is kind of the point. It’s why you do it. Because that’s where the real experience happens. That’s where the growth actually takes place.

I don’t love roller coasters or not having dinner plans picked out. But somehow, not knowing where my entire life is headed — that’s the kind of thrill I seem to be always seeking.

The best part of this whole thing is that we’re easing into it. Daniel had vacation time to use, so we decided that after landing in Madrid, we’d take a few weeks to explore before jumping into expat life and we’re playing tourist for a little while.

The analogy I gave the kids is that we’re slipping slowly into the pool via the shallow end, instead of diving into the deep, dark, cold abyss. It’s a warm and gentle entry without a big shock to the system. As we vacation and get used to things first, it’ll be like slowly wading deeper into the water — until one day we realize we’re doing it! We’ve made it to the deep end and we’re swimming! Hopefully without struggling too much to get there.

That deep end is the goal. That’s where you gain your strength. That’s where you build confidence and start to feel proud of yourself — and start having the real fun.

But for now? No swimming. Not yet anyway. I’m just walking my two feet to the plane.

One step at a time.